It's crazy how quickly situations change. Only maybe a week and a half ago I was still hoping for us to get back together, I really thought everything could change and we could get back to the bliss that once was our relationship.
I guess I never stopped to think how much damage was being inflicted on me. I never stopped to think about the times in our relationship where I really wasn't happy. I never thought about the changes I'd seen in him, the cold eyes that didn't show any love, the last time I slept over at his university and he made jokes about another girl in front of me and let me cry myself to sleep beside him, the strange deletion of everything associated with me on Facebook, all of our photos and memories gone. I didn't think about the time he laughed down the phone at me, telling me I was stupid for thinking we were going to be together forever.
Things have changed so much, I saw what he was really like and was forced in that hour the other day to come to terms with the fact that he was no longer the person I fell in love with. Maybe he'll change back to his old self in a while, it could just be a massive over reaction to the guilt he's feeling for everything. But he'll never be the same for me. I never want to see him or contact him again. I may forgive what he has done in time, but I will never forget the pain he caused me, or the cold hard hatred I saw in his eyes.
The aftermath is crazy, his sister (who saw how he behaved the other day) is going pyscho-bitch about me on Facebook, tagging me in loads of crazy posts and publicly bitching about me with her friends. One of my friends joked on my wall about getting a restraining order for him, I didn't even respond and his sister had created a status saying her mum was distraught that I would threaten legal action and be such a bitch. She got 38 likes before I detagged myself and though it was obvious to many that I had not threatened legal action, she's so popular at her school that people would believe anything that spouted out of her mouth. I've deleted her and all of her friends as well as blocking her on Facebook. Although I have detagged myself I can't delete the posts and I am just hoping that people will see through what she is saying. I know she is only trying to defend her brother, but it's awful as she clearly saw what he did to me. I just hope that she can get to terms with what he did and move on, rather than continuing to try and take her anger out on me. I just want to move on from what happened and forget about it in order to enjoy Christmas with my friends and family.
I guess I never stopped to think how much damage was being inflicted on me. I never stopped to think about the times in our relationship where I really wasn't happy. I never thought about the changes I'd seen in him, the cold eyes that didn't show any love, the last time I slept over at his university and he made jokes about another girl in front of me and let me cry myself to sleep beside him, the strange deletion of everything associated with me on Facebook, all of our photos and memories gone. I didn't think about the time he laughed down the phone at me, telling me I was stupid for thinking we were going to be together forever.
Things have changed so much, I saw what he was really like and was forced in that hour the other day to come to terms with the fact that he was no longer the person I fell in love with. Maybe he'll change back to his old self in a while, it could just be a massive over reaction to the guilt he's feeling for everything. But he'll never be the same for me. I never want to see him or contact him again. I may forgive what he has done in time, but I will never forget the pain he caused me, or the cold hard hatred I saw in his eyes.
The aftermath is crazy, his sister (who saw how he behaved the other day) is going pyscho-bitch about me on Facebook, tagging me in loads of crazy posts and publicly bitching about me with her friends. One of my friends joked on my wall about getting a restraining order for him, I didn't even respond and his sister had created a status saying her mum was distraught that I would threaten legal action and be such a bitch. She got 38 likes before I detagged myself and though it was obvious to many that I had not threatened legal action, she's so popular at her school that people would believe anything that spouted out of her mouth. I've deleted her and all of her friends as well as blocking her on Facebook. Although I have detagged myself I can't delete the posts and I am just hoping that people will see through what she is saying. I know she is only trying to defend her brother, but it's awful as she clearly saw what he did to me. I just hope that she can get to terms with what he did and move on, rather than continuing to try and take her anger out on me. I just want to move on from what happened and forget about it in order to enjoy Christmas with my friends and family.
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